The Hospital Window

Two men, both seriously ill, occupied the same hospital room.

One man was allowed to sit up in his bed for an hour each afternoon to help drain the fluid from his lungs. His bed was next to the room's only window.
The other man had to spend all his time flat on his back.

The men talked for hours on end. They spoke of their wives and families, their homes, their jobs, their involvement in the military service, where they had been on vacation.

Every afternoon when the man in the bed by the window could sit up, he would pass the time by describing to his roommate all the things he could see outside the window.

The man in the other bed began to live for those one hour periods where his world would be broadened and enlivened by all the activity and color of the world outside.

The window overlooked a park with a lovely lake. Ducks and swans played on the water while children sailed their model boats. Young lovers walked arm in arm amidst flowers of every color and a fine view of the city skyline could be seen in the distance.

As the man by the window described all this in exquisite detail, the man on the other side of the room would close his eyes and imagine the picturesque scene.

One warm afternoon the man by the window described a parade passing by.

Although the other man couldn't hear the band - he could see it. In his mind's eye as the gentleman by the window portrayed it with descriptive words.

Days and weeks passed.

One morning, the day nurse arrived to bring water for their baths only to find the lifeless body of the man by the window, who had died peacefully in his sleep. She was saddened and called the hospital attendants to take the body away.

As soon as it seemed appropriate, the other man asked if he could be moved next to the window. The nurse was happy to make the switch, and after making sure he was comfortable, she left him alone.

Slowly, painfully, he propped himself up on one elbow to take his first look at the real world outside. He strained to slowly turn to look out the window beside the bed.

It faced a blank wall.

The man asked the nurse what could have compelled his deceased roommate who had described such wonderful things outside this window.

The nurse responded that the man was blind and could not even see the wall.

She said, "Perhaps he just wanted to encourage you."

Epilogue:

There is tremendous happiness in making others happy, despite our own situations.

Shared grief is half the sorrow, but happiness when shared, is doubled.

If you want to feel rich, just count all the things you have that money can't buy.

"Today is a gift, that's why it is called the Present."

There Are Many Who Can Teach But Only A Few Who Can Reach

I want to dedicate the following piece to my mother and all my friends out there who are teachers or teacher’s assistants. I've been a part of one too many conversations where people have undervalued just how much teacher’s actually do. Read this and you’ll see what I mean.

What  Teachers Make

He says the problem with teachers is, "What's a kid going to learn from someone who decided his best option in life was to become a teacher?" He reminds the other dinner guests that it's true what they say about teachers: Those who can, do; those who can't, teach.

I decide to bite my tongue instead of his and resist the temptation to remind the other dinner guests that it's also true what they say about lawyers.

Because we're eating, after all, and this is polite company.

"I mean, you're a teacher, Taylor," he says. "Be honest. What do you make?"

I wish he hadn't done that (asked me to be honest), because, you see, I have a policy about honesty and butt-kicking: 
if you ask for it, I have to let you have it.

You want to know what I make?

I make kids work harder than they ever thought they could. 
I can make a C+ feel like a Congressional medal of honor and an A- feel like a slap in the face. 
How dare you waste my time with anything less than your very best.

I make kids sit through 40 minutes of study hall in absolute silence. 
No, you may not work in groups. 
No, you may not ask a question. 

Why won't I let you get a drink of water? 

Because you're not thirsty, you're bored, that's why.

I make parents tremble in fear when I call home: 
I hope I haven't called at a bad time, 
I just wanted to talk to you about something Billy said today. 

Billy said, "Leave the kid alone. I still cry sometimes, don't you?" 

And it was the noblest act of courage I have ever seen.

I make parents see their children for who they are and what they can be.

You want to know what I make?

I make kids wonder, 
I make them question. 

I make them criticize.
I make them apologize and mean it. 
I make them write, write, write. 

And then I make them read. 
I make them spell definitely beautiful, definitely beautiful, definitely beautiful over and over and over again until they will never misspell either one of those words again. 

I make them show all their work in math. 

And hide it on their final drafts in English.
I make them understand that if you got this (brains) then you follow this (heart) and if someone ever tries to judge you by what you make, you give them this (the finger).

Let me break it down for you, so you know what I say is true: 
I make a huge difference! What about you?

More Praying, Less Saying

We all have our struggles when it comes to Yiddishkeit. (Well most of us do!)

There are those Mitzvos that we take pleasure in and look forward to doing and those that we sometimes find bothersome and annoying.

Pretty much as far back as I can remember I absolutely loathed Davening.

Thinking back I can't even pinpoint what it was exactly that I disliked so much but I dreaded it and avoided it at all costs.
Most of high school I spent the time allotted to Davening doing anything but.

Between socializing, gossiping, studying I was always busy doing something.

On those seldom days when I was feeling overly spiritual or my principal was on the prowl and I decided that Davening might be a good plan I took such shortcuts through Davening I don't think I myself was even sure what I was saying, forget G-d.
Then it happened.

It was one random day at the beginning of my senior year.

It occurred to me just how stupid I've been all these years.
A burden?!
A frustration?!
Am I crazy?!
Davening is one of the most incredible gifts I've been given.
Here is twenty/thirty minutes of my day devoted solely to connecting to G-d.
On one hand I realized it was an opportune time for me to ask anything and everything I want. 

What ever it is I'm lacking.

Things I want more of.

Brochos for me.

For my family.

Friends etc…

This was MY time.
From another side I realized here was the perfect chance to thank G-d for everything he gives me. Starting with Him giving me back my life in the morning, to the food I eat throughout the day, the clothing on my back and the list goes on and on

To think there was a point in my life where I felt I couldn't take a half hour, just a half hour, from the twenty four hours of good He's giving me, to thank him?!

Selfish much??
Although all this really is not a new or earth shattering concept and nothing I didn't already know it was like I had some sort of epiphany where it all became so clear to me.
From that moment on Davening become a whole new experience.
It was something I grew to love and cherish and most days even look forward to.
It’s my one on one time with G-d where no request is off limits and I get to let Him know just how thankful I am for all that He's given me.

Now saying the words of Davening is very nice and when it comes to fulfilling the basic part of the Mitzvah that will cover it, but it takes on a whole new level of meaningfulness and power when you actually understand the words you are saying.

To really fulfill the deeper part of the Mitzvah you’re Kavanos play a huge role.

Unfortunately though it’s pretty tedious and most of us don't really have the luxury to sit with an English-Hebrew Siddur and really understand every paragraph we're saying. .

Like with all seemingly impossible things it’s really all about the baby steps.

To help with that I decided to start a series of posts that I will sporadically blog on the meaning behind different Teffilos.

I’m calling them, "More Praying, Less Saying."

My goal is to focus on some key Teffilos and the meaning behind them.

Reading about these Tefillos, where they originated from, what special Kochos they possess will hopefully fill your morning experience with more praying and less saying. 

Stay tuned!

Find Your Balance

The following is today’s Hayom Yom:

“The unique quality of Moshiach is that he will be humble. Though he will be the ultimate in greatness, for he will teach Torah to the Avos and to Moshe Rabeinu, still he will be the ultimate in humility and self-nullification, for he will also teach simple folk.”

I feel this Hayom Yom can teach us a very valuable lesson in our daily Avodah.

On one hand it is of the utmost importance to realize how special and important we are. Like it says “Kol Eched V’Eched Chayav Lomar Bishvili Nivrah Ha’Olam (Sanhedrin 37)” Each and every person must take to heart that the world was especially made just for him as he is. Every human being is a world to himself/herself, and is a central part of the universe.

We need to truly believe this and incorporate it into our daily lives.

On the other hand, it is equally important to have humility and to dwell on the greatness of Hashem and how small we are in comparison.

Not to G-d forbid makes us feel bad about ourselves but to help gain a better and clearer understanding of how Hashem runs the world.

Knowing how limited we are in comparison to an unlimited, encompassing force can help us get through hard times when we question what we see happening.

Maintaining such a balance is not easy but is extremely vital in our service of Hashem.

Take ten/fifteen minutes tomorrow when you wake up and think about it.

Next time you’re feeling like you don’t matter or are just one of millions; remember Hashem created this world for YOU.

Next time you’re faced with an obstacle and get frustrated that you can’t understand it, remember that Hashem knows all and there is a far bigger picture out there.

To end with a small quote from Hillel: “One who seeks fame loses his name; one who fails to increase [his knowledge] decreases it; one who does not study Torah deserves death; and one who misuses the crown [of Torah] will wither.”

Find your balance.

Paradox of Our Time

Something to think about…

We have taller buildings, but shorter tempers; wider freeways, but narrower viewpoints; we spend more, but have less; we buy more, but enjoy it less.

We have bigger houses and smaller families; more conveniences, but less time; we have more degrees, but less common sense; more knowledge, but less judgment; more experts, but more problems; more medicine, but less wellness.

We spend too recklessly, laugh too little, drive too fast, get too angry too quickly, stay up too late, get up too tired, read too seldom, watch TV too much, and pray too seldom.

We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values.

We talk too much, love too seldom and lie too often.

We've learned how to make a living, but not a life; we've added years to life, not life to years.

We've been all the way to the moon and back, but have trouble crossing the street to meet the new neighbor.

We've conquered outer space, but not inner space; we've done larger things, but not better things; we've cleaned up the air, but polluted the soul; we've split the atom, but not our prejudice; we write more, but learn less; plan more, but accomplish less.

We've learned to rush, but not to wait; we have higher incomes, but lower morals; more food but less appeasement; more acquaintances, but fewer friends; more effort but less success.

We build more computers to hold more information, to produce more copies than ever, but have less communication; we've become long on quantity, but short on quality.

These are the time of fast foods and slow digestion; tall men and short character; steep profits, and shallow relationships.

These are the times of world peace, but domestic warfare; more leisure and less fun; more kinds of food, but less nutrition.

These are days of two incomes, but more divorce; of fancier houses, but broken homes.

These are days of quick trips, disposable diapers, throwaway morality, one-night stands, overweight bodies, and pills that do everything from cheer, to quiet, to kill.

It is a time when there is much in the show window, and nothing in the stockroom.

The Brick

A young and successful executive was traveling down a neighborhood street, going a bit too fast in his new Jaguar.

He was watching for kids darting out from between parked cars and slowed down when he thought he saw something. As his car passed, no children appeared. Instead, a brick smashed into the Jag's side door!

He slammed on the brakes and backed the Jag back to the spot where the brick had been thrown.

The angry driver then jumped out of the car, grabbed the nearest kid, and pushed him up against a parked car shouting, "What was that all about and who are you? Just what the heck are you doing? That's a new car and that brick you threw is going to cost a lot of money. Why did you do it?"

The young boy was apologetic.

"Please, mister... please, I'm sorry but I didn't know what else to do," He pleaded. "I threw the brick because no one else would stop... " With tears dripping down his face and off his chin, the youth pointed to a spot just around a parked car.

"It's my brother," he said. "He rolled off the curb and fell out of his wheelchair and I can't lift him up."

Now sobbing, the boy asked the stunned executive, "Would you please help me get him back into his wheelchair? He's hurt and he's too heavy for me."

Moved beyond words, the driver tried to swallow the rapidly swelling lump in his throat. He hurriedly lifted the handicapped boy back into the wheelchair, then took out a linen handkerchief and dabbed at the fresh scrapes and cuts.

A quick look told him everything was going to be okay.

"Thank you and may G-d bless you," the grateful child told the stranger.

Too shook up for words, the man simply watched the boy push his wheelchair-bound brother down the sidewalk toward their home. It was a long, slow walk back to the Jaguar.

The damage was very noticeable, but the driver never bothered to repair the dented side door. He kept the dent there to remind him of this message:

"Don't go through life so fast that someone has to throw a brick at you to get your attention."

Hashem is always talking to us and sending us messages. Sometimes when we don't have time to listen, He has to throw a brick at us.

It's our choice to listen or not.

Confronting Confrontation

We all have our fears.

There are the usual physical fears.
Fear of heights, rodents, spiders, small spaces.

There are some unusual physical fears.
Fear of clowns, long words, flowers.

Then there are non tangible fears.
Fear of the unknown, fear of change, commitment, imperfection.

One of my biggest fears I think is my fear of confrontation.

I like to avoid conflict at all costs.
I have no problem admitting when I'm wrong; in fact I’ll be more than happy to admit defeat when arguing with a stubborn person if it means I won't have to confront them.

When it comes to asking someone for a favor, calling someone out on something, or even standing up for myself, I constantly struggle.

Although “fears” are not necessarily a positive thing, the feeling you get when overcoming one is incredible. I got to experience this sentiment yesterday.

There was somebody whom I needed to confront about something. I needed to ask something of them and this something was not such a simple thing.

To say that I was panicking and literally having anxiety the days, hours, minutes, and then seconds leading up to the meeting would be an understatement!

How did I end up pushing myself to do it?

How did I actually go ahead and ask what I needed to when my heart was pounding, brow sweating, and every ounce of my being telling me to just turn around and run?

Turned out to be fairly simple.

I just didn’t allow myself to think about it.

I told those voices in my head to just shush, I ignored that clamoring going on in the left side of my chest cavity, and just pushed myself forward without looking back.

Proved to be extremely efficient and all in all everything couldn’t have worked out better.

I was so proud of myself.

Happier than my actual accomplishment of attaining that which I asked for, I was so happy that I had overcome one of my biggest fears.

Now I know what you’re thinking.

That what I’m saying has that familiar ring to it of sounding a whole lot easier then it actually is.

But that’s false.

What a lot of people don’t realize is that more often then not, the only one who stands in their way of doing what they need to, or accomplishing that which they are capable of accomplishing, is themselves. This brings to mind a quote by Ralph Waldo Emerson (brilliant man btw) “Most of the shadows of this life are caused by our standing in our own sunshine.”

The human mind loves nothing more than to ration and justify. Sometimes all it needs is you to step in and seize control over it.

FDR said in his opening inaugural statement, “The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.”

Don’t let your fears hinder you.

Choose one thing. Something you dread or that causes you to step a bit out of your comfort zone and show yourself you can do it.

Trust me, the rewarding feeling after makes it all worth it!